The way they love: I loved him too much so I could not marry him
Sad moments are very inspirational. I don’t have many so I am going to try to write something while it lasts. I am in my room without electric power. Darkness makes my mood even darker. I am running a fight against the dancing mosquitoes attracted by my laptop’s screenlight. I feel a tremendous sadness for three friends going into love trouble. Despite my short stay in India I’ve already heard about probably the two most painful love stories I’ve ever heard.
Right in the plane that brought me here I saw a movie titled “In the Metro”, it is all about infidelities and promiscuity in urban India. There is a touch of traditional arranged love in there too. The idea of having people cheating on each other does not depend on GDP per capita or Gini coefficient. Poor and rich, we all live and like drama and unfaithfulness very similarly.
Most of my coworkers but two are men in marriageable ages. According to a Guardian article I read the other day, in India it is easier to get a wife than to get laid. Huh. I think this might depend on GDP per capita. In the Western world it is easier to get laid and burnt than to find a wife/husband with whom you’d like to spend the rest of your life. Talking to one of my IT colleagues about marriage. He told me that he might marry this year, “my parents are taking care of that”, he said. After a long conversation I was convinced that giving the right to your parents to make that important decision for you is just a signal of respect and thanksgiving. If I stay longer in India I think I am going to start dressing ‘a la Gandhi’, with white pure cotton clothing, eating only vegetarian non-oily food, accepting that love depends on whether you are a good astrological match or not to your sugar babe…
Indians (I am terribly generalizing) believe in astrology, in family, in respecting their parent’s decision about marriage, in fortunetellers, in Gods…I am reading this interesting book written by an FT correspondent titled “In spite of the Gods, the rise of modern India”. I could not understand the title very well before coming here. Now it makes more sense to me. The spirituality of India makes me want to become one of the hippie Europeans meditating in temples. I might do that this weekend in Pondicherry.
I leave you with the words of one of my new friends “I could not marry him because I loved him too much. The fortune teller told me that our stars did not align. He would die young had he married me”.
Right in the plane that brought me here I saw a movie titled “In the Metro”, it is all about infidelities and promiscuity in urban India. There is a touch of traditional arranged love in there too. The idea of having people cheating on each other does not depend on GDP per capita or Gini coefficient. Poor and rich, we all live and like drama and unfaithfulness very similarly.
Most of my coworkers but two are men in marriageable ages. According to a Guardian article I read the other day, in India it is easier to get a wife than to get laid. Huh. I think this might depend on GDP per capita. In the Western world it is easier to get laid and burnt than to find a wife/husband with whom you’d like to spend the rest of your life. Talking to one of my IT colleagues about marriage. He told me that he might marry this year, “my parents are taking care of that”, he said. After a long conversation I was convinced that giving the right to your parents to make that important decision for you is just a signal of respect and thanksgiving. If I stay longer in India I think I am going to start dressing ‘a la Gandhi’, with white pure cotton clothing, eating only vegetarian non-oily food, accepting that love depends on whether you are a good astrological match or not to your sugar babe…
Indians (I am terribly generalizing) believe in astrology, in family, in respecting their parent’s decision about marriage, in fortunetellers, in Gods…I am reading this interesting book written by an FT correspondent titled “In spite of the Gods, the rise of modern India”. I could not understand the title very well before coming here. Now it makes more sense to me. The spirituality of India makes me want to become one of the hippie Europeans meditating in temples. I might do that this weekend in Pondicherry.
I leave you with the words of one of my new friends “I could not marry him because I loved him too much. The fortune teller told me that our stars did not align. He would die young had he married me”.
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